HER

I drench myself in perfumes

Hide behind this mask of makeup

Cover myself with these tight clothes

And wear these shoes to make me her

That I will never be                             

Pretty hurts

As I pop this pimple

Tweeze these hairs

Add to these nails

Put on these lashes

Wear this weave

To please the eye

To be called beauty                                                           

To represent beauty

But I’m tired of been pretty

I’m tired of trying to be beautiful

I’m weary of the pain that comes with pretty

Most of all I’m tired of hiding

Who I am behind her

I’m tired of trying to get hips

Wearing push up bras for

 fuller and bigger breast

I do not want to wear these tight

Heels that hurt and leave blisters

I constantly fight

With myself  and who

I am meant to be

I wonder if I am pretty enough

Skinny enough

If I talk right, look right, walk right

To be like her

I don't want to be her

I want to be me

And I want you to love

Me for me

                                           the lovepoet

                                         from the heart

p.s  HER is society's definition of a perfect, beautiful woman.

PAIN

She shakes

Weak, filled with pain

As she carries the world

On her shoulders

She cant

Bare to see herself

Face creased and sad

As tears slowly fall to the ground

She wishes

She could stop

This feeling within her heart

Rip it out of her chest

She hopes

Someone will hear her cry

Comfort her, hold her

Just take the pain away

But she is alone

And destined to

Suffer this pain

Inflicted on her

By death

For she is one

Of the few he

Tells when his

Sent to take

A person away

She cries and cries

Calls out for help

But no one is there

No one hears her

So she drugs herself to sleep

Hoping to wake with the feeling gone


                                                   the lovepoet

I FORGIVE MYSELF

I forgive myself

From the hurt and pain

I caused upon myself

I forgive myself

For believing that I am a disappointment

Because you said so

I forgive myself

For feeling unworthy, unintelligent, careless

Because I believed I was

I forgive myself

From crying night after night  

Because I thought I was a failure

I forgive myself

For believing I was a failure

Because I did not see that it was an opportunity,

a learning experience

I forgive myself

For thinking I could never be loved

Because you didn’t love me

I forgive myself

For not loving me enough

Because I thought I was not the

 type to be loved by anyone not even me

I forgive myself

For thinking I am ugly

Because my skin is not light

My hips are not wide

My face is not smooth

I forgive myself

For not thinking I’m smart

Because I didn’t know maths

Nor did I always get As

Lastly I forgive myself

For trying to commit suicide

Because I thought I was a problem

A burden, a disgrace, unfit to live, fearful

Mostly because I was a coward

                                                         the lovepoet

                                                     from deep within the soul